Kiss It, Merrill!

Today was my last day at work. I worked at Merrill Lynch on the Early Case Evaluation team and since June 10th, when they chose my replacement and I trained her, I have done nothing - nothing! - like as in nothing, all day, every day. Nothing.

To mark the occasion of a last day at a job where I literally had no job to do, I showed up at 10:30, took an hour for lunch at 11:00 (sushi!), and then I went home at 2:00.

So as I was walking home with the bouquet of flowers my husband had left at my desk that morning, some guy in front of my building wearing stupid khaki shorts and stupid sandals with stupid tube socks says, "Those flowers for me??"

I contemplated smiling and ignoring and not making eye contact and just carrying on and leaving this man in peace with his sad, strange little sense of humor, but then I thought, No! I am in New York! For one more week! And people in New York are mean!

So I called up my best New York from the bottom of my soul. I gave him The Look.

Then the guy with no legs who lives in the penthouse of my building and who sits outside all day in his wheelchair and who always looks at me like I'm an idiot, well. He smiled at me.

And then he shrugged his shoulders.


So when I go to Moscow and they ask me where I am from (I hate this question, for there really is no answer, except maybe Heaven), I think I’ll say New York City.

And I'll let that be my excuse every time I'm feeling snarky.

Which is pretty often, let's face it.