recently, jose the doorman has taken to calling huck 'brandon.'
it is possibly the weirdest thing going on in my life these days and i am devoting quite a bit of thought to it.
for instance: am i a terrible person for not correcting him? did something happen to jose and he has lost his short-term memory? should i be concerned? is he teasing somehow and i'm not getting it? is possibly jose's brain stuck in some kind of weird looping pattern?
do i worry too much about embarrassing him, and that's why i won't correct him? or do i just really hate small talk that much?
because i am quite capable of telling a person my entire life story and each of my innermost thoughts, even when they are scandalously unthought-out, just so long as i don't have to make awkward small-talk later. oh bother. i am typing with one hand (nursing) and as such it is possible none of this is making any sense.
in any case.
today my sister in law sent us a package of cinnamon bears from the byu bookstore today. it was incredibly exciting, as you shall see.
and then i went to book club.
I agree with everything you said! I love big talk too and quickly check out of any small talk conversations. Anyway, not to blow smoke...but you are my favorite blogger and I did walk around the uws with my twins when I was on maternity leave hoping I would bump into you. Now I've moved to Chelsea so we won't ever have that chance meeting. I would definitely be obnoxiously telling you how much I admire you while you tried to escape.
ReplyDeleteYour child is my inspiration but my twins just won't gain more weight. Which is weird as all the babies on my side are huge and Michelin-man-y, so I'm blaming my Beau for his skinny genes. Lord knows I was as fat as a sausage, so it's not me.
So glad I'm not the only awkward person who feels compelled by some mysterious force to spill everything on my mind to someone I barely know!!! I'm pretty much always suffering from a I-told-that-person-too-much hangover.
ReplyDeleteIf Jose is Hispanic then you should just make fun of him for calling your son the wrong name...Hispanics make fun of each other A LOT. He won't be offended.
I love that book, it is AMAZING. I hope your book group has enjoyed it, too.
ReplyDeleteAnd my sister raves about those bears all the time, I need her to send me some or something. I definitely love string cheese, but if they're preferred over glorious mozzarella sticks, well... I must be missing out on something good.
Eh, maybe someone called Huck "Jr." in front of Jose and he misunderstood? I say who cares, unless it bothers Brandon...
ReplyDeleteDid you like the book? I was eyeing it in the bookstore but didn't get it.
i got to the end of that book and literally stood on my chair because i was so happy. and then i cried because it was the end.
ReplyDeleteenjoy.
this is hilarious. lately your blog is my absolute favorite. everyone else says everyone else has a gift for writing. they don't. you have the gift of gab and that is probably my favorite part of your writing, which makes me want to say that you have the gift to write.
ReplyDeleteim soo bad at correcting people too! especially when people are being nice to my little bebe, it's hard to tell them they're being stupid (or something less mean, but still...don't they always feel like you've said that anyways?)
ReplyDeleteSmoking Crayolas Blogspot
Hi, Loved the post. I went to BYU and had requests to get those & yogurt pretzels!
ReplyDeleteWhat is the book?
I say you've got to tell Jose. Either just tell him, or say it in a jokey way as suggested above, or, like Say "Brandon" when the holbs is around, very obviously, or, but just DO IT! Because he's probably going to find out some day and if it's not from you he will think you think something you don't think! Like all the romantic comedies ever made! It's gotta come from you and it's gotta come quick!!! It won't be as painful as you think. Just do it. like a band-aid. Today! Don't plan too much you'll stress yourself. Just do it.
ReplyDeleteAh! I love the chocolate covered cinnamon bears! I get the same look sad look Huck got, although a million times less cute, when I realize I ate the entire bag in one sitting! Whoops!
ReplyDeleteI have no idea what that book is but apparently a lot of the previous commentators enjoyed it so maybe you could review it for the few of us who have no clue what is up with that?
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ReplyDeletei loved this.
ReplyDeletehate the small talk. hate it.
ReplyDeletebut here's the way you fix jose's mishap..
*holding Huck up*, "Huck DOES look like Brandon a little doesn't he?! But, I think Huck really looks more like me."
And possibly, just possibly, you ask Jose to give his opinion.
Although, we all know what can happen when asking for one of those...
I loved that book so dang much... Laughed, cried, laughed some more.
ReplyDeleteyikes. he is upset in that photo! poor huck. and i also only do big talk, so eventually i just stop talking to strangers. you know just head nods and the like.
ReplyDeleteLove this post Natalie. I wish I was in your book club so we could practice stream of consciousness talking together:)
ReplyDeletePs. Is that book The Guernsey Literary and Potato Peel Society?! GOOOOOD book.
I hate small talk too! It's one of the reasons I hate having an office job (along with my coworkers acting like backstabbing middle schoolers). I love Melanie's suggestion of giving Jose the right idea without outright telling him he's wrong.
ReplyDeleteDELURK
ReplyDeleteYES.
I went to a thing last night, and was dreading it, because of all of the potential for smallish talk, (which always makes ME feel so small), but immediately ran into one of my BFFS and ended up having a big talkish night after all. I love it when that happens - it's such a nice surprise.
This post makes me miss you, which is sort of an obnoxious thing to say seeing as we've only talked a few times. But I always felt like we WOULD be ever so close if stupid geography weren't, well, stupid geography.
I remember when we went out, that one time, and I was nervous about the small talk but we sort of managed to have lots of moments of BIG talk, which made me happy. And sad, since you were living OH THOUSANDS OF MILES AWAY.
Bother.
RELURK
Obviously the guy is trying to be engaging and personable. And the kid does look like his daddy. The doorman would want to know so he can get it right. So smile your pretty, sweet smile, and say, Jose, his name is Huck. BTW, we have Holbrooks in my family. I lived in Staten Island my turn in NYC. Ferry rides every day! Good time to get the BoM read again. Oh, but, I'm straying off topic. Sorry, TMI. What am I talking about? Have a great day, and stay just like you are.
ReplyDeleteugh I totally know what you mean...and at some point it is too late to say anything without it being super awkward! I mean...what would he say if brandon came down holding huck?! might he realize there is only one brandon? or what if he just happened to overhear you speaking to huck, emphasizing that his name is huck?! just a few ideas. good luck!
ReplyDeleteOh, I adore that book and hope you do too!
ReplyDeleteI had some JW's that would come by and they kept calling me Lauren. After a while it just got too awkward to correct them. Surely they'd be all "Why didn't you say anything before?" And I'd be all "I didn't know you were going to KEEP COMING TO MY HOUSE!" Awkward.
Next time, you should say "yeah, I think he looks like a little mini brandon, too, but most people think he looks like me! It's funny that you see the same similarities I do. Must be because you see the three of us so often!" And then turn to the baby and, in your best baby voice, say "huh, Huck. You look just like Daddy." That way, he gets the point that Brandon is your hubby, Huck is the baby, but you didn't really correct him. He'll just think you were assuming he was joking, he'll draw the necessary conclusions, and neither of you will feel like there was any correcting to be had.
ReplyDeleteGUERNSEY!! also...i think i fail(?) at first dates frequently because small talk is expected of me. First dates always go best for me when we end up having long, soulful chats until 3am. If i have to talk about the weather and howmanykidsareinyourfamily for 2 hrs, i'm glad the date ends at 8pm. A guy called me out on it last week when, halfway thru some smallishtalk about "what's your career goals" i said "Sooo...what makes you happy? i want to know what makes you really happy." He looked at me, surprised, then said, "that's a big question to ask while sitting in the corner of a party." Well....yep. One of my favorite questions? "What do you like about yourself?" it's a good one.
ReplyDeleteI have a Huck too...nickname. Your post reminds me of my college days noshing on those chocolate-covered devil candies. They're evil and delicious, I tell ya! Tis the season for cinnamon goodness, and you better believe that I'm going to take full advantage of that.
ReplyDeleteI am a major big talker. Probably why I think everyone is my best friend when really we just have the same dry cleaner or something. My husband is continually embarassed for me and I defend myself by saying "she asked how my day was!"
ReplyDeletePeople call my gorgeous little bald she-baby a he-baby all the time, and I let them get away with it. Friendly trumps unobservant for strangers but for doormen maybe not so much.
ReplyDeleteOh boy, do I know about hiding from small talk. I try my damndest to escape from it; like the time I left my grandma's early to runaway from the visitors I would have to participate in small talk in broken Arabic. Scary! But, then I do the "Hi, how are you?" dance everyday at work with customers and co-workers. The small talk with the customers is usually cute and ends up with me over sharing (high-fives for that, sister!), and when they don't care it's kind of mean. Like, really, you don't care about how much my feet hurt and how other patrons of this fast food haven are mean as heck? Really? Small talk with co-workers is different. Mostly I just say HELLO! to them a billion times a day because I'd rather over share with strangers than with people who are going to talk about me later. Fast foodies are meanies.
ReplyDeleteI'm glad I'm not the only one with this big talking problem. My friends and family think I'm a weirdo for this, but whuddevah, I'm not alone so they can put that in their pipes and inhale THAT.
The Guernsey Literary and Potato Peel Pie Society is and will always be my FAVORITE book of all time. Well, Peace Like a River is a close second. But it's Guernsey by a hair.
ReplyDeleteSo cute. All of it, and how I wish more people would subject me to their "big talk." I never find it an aural assault to learn more about a person, especially a nice one who likes licorice.
ReplyDeleteThis post reached down unto the very depths of my small-talkily-challenged heart. I too am a big-talker, and oh how I wish everyone else were as well. Can you imagine how utterly fascinating all of our conversations would be?
ReplyDeleteyes but are you loving the guernsey literary and potato peel pie society or what? i have so much amorousness for that sweet little book.
ReplyDeletedo you love it?