i spent a long, lovely afternoon with one of my favorite people yesterday, talking her ear completely off and onto the sidewalk, and eating a lot of the city's best food. the thing about courtney kendrick is that she inspires me to open my guts out all over her. she inspires me to try harder and think deeper. all day long i've had a courtney high and it has been blissful. so thanks, court. muah!
i've decided to focus on my gratitude. so here are some things about today that i liked real hard. in no particular order!
we ran to trader joe's this afternoon for some mac and cheese. our favorite employee, trader joe tim, happened to be on shift, he does a really good impression of the cowardly lion. he had huck screeching in laughter. we've been in the neighborhood long enough that we know all the regular employees at all our regular places and that makes me happy.
so we got a strawberry smoothie off the street aaaaand it matched my pants.
i was browsing through my blog today, and i reread the paragraph i wrote about the playground at washington square the other day. i rolled my eyes at myself again (i rolled my eyes at myself as i wrote it), and then i suddenly had one of those moments where i wished i could go back in time and show that paragraph to 2009-me. i could just picture it. LOOK at this! you are talking about swim diapers! this is going to happen!!!!! do you know what that would even do to a girl like 2009-me? oh man! just picturing it makes every possible thing feel possible again. do you know what i mean? it makes me wonder about all of the amazing things 2013-me could show today-me, if she came to me right now at the dinner table. think of what even next-week-me could say that might blow my mind. sometimes i think about how close i might be to the moment that changes my life, and how often do i want to give up on things too soon, thinking i am still millions of miles away. how often do i despair unnecessarily? if we could only see the mere inches that stand between us and our goals, do you think we'd try even harder to get there? or just better enjoy the journey?
so today i want to remind myself to be grateful.
the journey is really pretty great.
u got deep with it. i like it.
ReplyDeletelove this! and i'm loving your outfit in the first pic. and hucks outfit in the last pic. but i'm really just loving this whole entire thing.
ReplyDeletei know just what you mean about being ALMOST over the bad experiences, focusing on the positive over the negative, but sometimes...sometimes that negative has to have its say, too. lol
ReplyDeletelove the trader joe story! : ) and also, sometimes i wish i could go back to 2005 or 2006 carrie & tell her to hug her dad more, more, more. every day while she can. *sigh*
Great last para...I wonder what next week will hold for me (new job maybe)???
ReplyDeletelovely conclusion, thank you so much.
ReplyDeleteThis is my first time reading your blog. I have followed you on instagram for a while but never read your blog and today I just happened to read. And man, oh man, was it just what I needed. Lately, feels like for the last year but especially the last few months, I have been feeling like nothing that I want to happen to me is happen or will happen. In school area and love area mostly. I go to bed most nights thinking "When will it happen, Heavenly Father, when will I be happy?" I often say that I want to know when things will happen just so I know when to worry or not. The last part of your post really struck a chord with me. I might be looking back at myself in 6 months with everything I want and feeling so foolish for being so despaired. I just have to trust the Lord and try my hardest at everything cause I never will know when it will happen but I know it will be all worth it. And it will be even more worth it if I stop and smell the roses and enjoy the journey.
ReplyDeleteOnce again you've managed to say all manner of things I need to hear. And say them with wit and style and humor.
ReplyDeleteYou have a way of inviting people to join in a good thing rather than preaching at them to do what they ought. I appreciate that, because being preached at feels like getting poked & prodded at the doctor's office and I draw into my shell like a grumpy turtle.
But not here. Not with Nat.
You and Courtney? Some of the great blogging minds converged together. Was there a bit of lightening. ;)
ReplyDeleteI've got back and cringed at what I've written and felt was blog worthy. I've even been tempted to DELETE. But that would be like deleting a part of myself. I am a work in progress just like my blog.
Yes, I needed to hear this TODAY. Its too easy to give up too soon, to get lost in the despair unnecessarily.
ReplyDeleteI have a lot to tell my 2009, 2010, 2011 selves and can't wait to see what I will have to tell my today self. (Ah ha! "can't wait"...impatience runs rampant here! I think that's our problem.)
Thanks for the reminder, Nat. And for that lovely round headed, chubby legged Huckster. He's the bee's knees.
AMAZING post. It was just what I needed to hear today!! So glad to hear that you had a happy and grateful kinda day. Oh and thanks for helping me to remember to enjoy the ride:)
ReplyDeleteIt sounds like such a good errand day! Huck's little face when t.j. tim makes him laugh is the cutest thing in the world.
ReplyDeletei just decided to quit after 4 years.
ReplyDeleteim nervous as all hell but this final paragraph on your post just told my tummy butterflies to chill, man, chill.
everything is going to be a-ok. can't wait for my 2013-me to tell me that!
(clearly i needed to hear this all today)
xo the egg out west.
inches. inches make all the difference. i'm yearning to get to the next phase - so close i can almost taste it - and i'll keep remembering what i would say to myself now from way in 2013. there are so many times where i look at pictures of huck, or hear your cute stories of him laughing and squealing, and am just amazed that this is what was waiting for you - because he is amazing. thanks for another great post.
ReplyDeleteA beauty of a post. Loved your Mama Style posts from last week, too--you remind me that buying the little cute pants isn't always enough.
ReplyDeleteI don't pray. But I do hold people in my thoughts. I'm holding both 2012 and 2013 yous in my thoughts. Who was it, Forster, "the journey not the arrival matters"? (Hm, or Eliot, or Mr. Woolf...at any rate.)
This is my favorite kind of Nat post. A whole bunch of little things that squish together into one big feeling that stirs my soul.
ReplyDeletethat smile on huck. i die.
ReplyDeleteThis post is just what I needed today. I have been in major stresswhatthehellisgoingtohappeninourlives mode so much recently that I have not stopped at all to enjoy the journey. We are trying for a baby (I blame yours and Sidney's blogs for the baby fever, thank you) and planning a move to the East Coast right now so I've been stress city. Thank you for such lovely little posts like this one. Love your face.
ReplyDeleteval
www.daily-distraction.com
Natalie, I love your outfit. The one with the strawberry shake-matching pants. Really cute. Also your phone (phone cover??). Which matches your shirt?! Pretty cool. :) I often wonder about my life (WHERE will we finally settle down?? WHEN will I have my dreamy dream of a log home??) and that sort of thing. But really, we just don't need to know everything yet, do we
ReplyDeleteI, Valerie Bagley, hereby vow to stop despairing unnecessarily. This was lovely. Thank you.
ReplyDeleteOh man. What is awesome about good bloggers (like you and C. Jane) is that you inspire each other and your good blogging inspires me. I was reading some CS Lewis about how sometimes our current trial is the uncertainty, the wait-it-out-ness of it all and that we don't realize it and we just get so fed up, but if we could see it eternally, we would chill.
ReplyDeleteThis post says the same thing to me, so maybe there's something that needs to get through this thick skull of mine.
Thanks for a good one Nat.
Thanks for reminding me to enjoy the ride :)
ReplyDeleteThis is EXACTLY what I needed to hear today, so thank you! And how cute is your son cracking up in the Trader Joes?! Love it!
ReplyDeleteYou know what? This just reminded me (inspired me) to stop with the unnecessary despairing and remember that I might be just inches away from what I almost declare impossible becoming possible.
ReplyDeleteThank you Natalie!
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ReplyDeleteI usually never comment, but I just wanted to say thank you for writing this post. It is exactly what I needed to hear in my life right now. I wish you the best of luck on your journey.
ReplyDeleteAnd this will probably come out all wrong, but I went to the TJ's on Broadway yesterday, and part of me (ok, a big part of me) was hoping for a Nat and Huck sighting. But alas, I missed you by a day
i am not going to lie, you made me cry today. i desperately needed to hear what you had to say about "2013 me". i am 35 and single and desperately want a family more than anything on earth. and just hearing that i could be inches from my goal helped me to reconsider what i am doing right now and how you have no idea how close you could be to your wildest dreams coming true. thank you for being inspired today. you helped me.
ReplyDeleteBeautiful post I wish so badly I could write as well as you! It's so funny because to me you have the perfect life I would seriously love to have it. But no life is perfect and I need to enjoy my moments and maybe one day 2015 Courtney will come and say SEE it will all work out. So anyways thanks for this post I loved it.
ReplyDeletejust saw you over at sydney's blog and now you're with cjane!! i'm loving it! lol!
ReplyDeletewww.wewouldlovetoadopt.blogspot.com
"sometimes i think about how close i might be to the moment that changes my whole world...how often i do i want to give up on it too soon, thinking i am still a million miles away?"
ReplyDeletei mostly read your blog because HELLO you are fabulous and reading about your adventures is like a fat free t.j.'s popsicle on a hot summer night (have you tried? totally anything goes--delightful, delicious, delovely). but then sometimes you write things like the above sentence and its like you are whispering the things i most need to hear directly into my heart and i just want to squeeze you and say thank you forever and ever.
i mean, DANG GIRL. get it.
Same quote as that ella girl! seriously Natalie. You're awesomeness.
ReplyDeleteTears! Thank you for sharing that, because, man, I needed it. I'm a working mommy who wants to stay home desperately. The husband and I are working on it, but oh dear, it just can't come fast enough and each day away from my girl is a tiny heart break. But it will come, and this journey will be good for me.
ReplyDeleteI know your day will come too, and I'm saying a little, super fertile prayer for you : )
Love your observations about going back and forth in time to different versions of yourself. Reminded me of this amusing video and I was wondering if you'd seen it yet: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XFGAQrEUaeU
ReplyDeleteLove this post! It really resonated with me today. Thank you for your insight.
ReplyDeleteThanks (again!). I've wallowed in the depths of despair, and now I know it's time to enjoy the journey. I cannot wait to find out what 2013-Angela has to tell!
ReplyDeleteAnd you know what else? You make NYC sound almost small-town homey, that's what!
love this post yo! perfect amount of humor and depth :)
ReplyDeleteLove this. And love that baby blue skirt in the first photo!! Where did get it, pretty please?
ReplyDeleteI remember those engineers...quitting that job was a happy day indeed.
ReplyDeleteIsn't life grand my friend?
i don't even have a baby and i want to go buy those pants! another fantastic post
ReplyDeleteSo true... I liked this post.
ReplyDeleteLove your writing and yes, life is good and we have a lot to be thankful for and a lot to enjoy. If we can keep our eyes open to the beauty around us and stay thankful, we can be so full of joy!
ReplyDeleteIve been away for a while - neglecting my poor old blog. But as always I enjoy reading yours, even if your life seems impossibly glamorous and fun as a matter of course!
ReplyDeletethat last paragraph--can you see into my head?
ReplyDeleteexactly what i needed to hear to just enjoy these moments and memories because they are here and now and i might not get it again.
and i love he said you were taller--classic! wish i could wear the shoes you do instead of my very boring flats.
Interestingly your journal serves to remind present me and future me that life is indeed pretty rich. So thanks for that. And thanks for being your honest, funny self even here on the Internet.
ReplyDelete-Deirdre
Love reading about your daily life in the city!It usually makes me either: a)hungry, b)jealous I don't live there, and c)want to come and rip your clothes off you and put them in my closet! I LOVED your leopord pants on Sydney's blog...AMAZING.
ReplyDeleteWhat a great post, it was just what I needed to read this morning! Let's enjoy our journey!
ReplyDeleteI read an interesting article the other day about celebrating the ordinary, and it really stuck with me, especially that bit. Celebrating the ordinary. Powerful stuff, that little phrase. I think you and Ferris Bueller (your last bit totally reminded me of him) really exemplify that.
ReplyDeleteNat and CJane Together!!??? HEAVEN!
ReplyDeleteright?? so cool!
DeleteThank you.. your final sentences are so helpful!
ReplyDeleteThis post made my eyes water. I try to remind myself of the very same thing, when I worry that the things I'm hoping for the most won't ever happen...how my life is probably going to look so different a year from now and maybe my wish is waiting just around the corner. Why is that so hard to remember sometimes?! Anyway, thanks for the reminder! :)
ReplyDeleteI loved where this post went. Great job, Natalie. You never disappoint.
ReplyDeleteyou inspired me. thank you for that.
ReplyDeleteHuck's little mandals are so cute. This is a very wise post.
ReplyDeleteLove reading about the man who does cowardly lion impression. Very much appreciate your thoughts in the closing paragraph, so true.
ReplyDeleteThank you for this post today-it really helped me this morning to keep a positive perspective and enjoy everything more.
ReplyDeleteYou know what's torture...when I went back to Pullman for Tiffany's wedding this past May (she got divorced two years ago and remarried in May) there were tons of SEL people there. Thankfully Ed wasn't there, but a few other unsavories were and it was really hard for me to bite my tongue and not just lay into them. The place really does suck the life and soul out of its workers. I couldn't name a single person who enjoys working for that company. I am SO GLAD to not be working for that company anymore. They are proof that you really can let the devil buy your soul. They mask their shit HR policies with high wages.
ReplyDeleteOhh I love this post! The last portion especially is so inspiring because I've been in such a rut lately and tend to lose sight/want to give up on a daily basis. Thank you for writing this and convincing me to stay optimistic! It was aptly timed. :)
ReplyDeleteHuck is too cute!
ReplyDeleteWell, and I loved this post today, Natalie. Hang in there, you. And a good reminder for myself, too.
ReplyDeleteThank you for the last bit of this post. That's something I need to remind myself--things will work out, so enjoy the present and stop worrying about the future. Just what I needed for today. Think you are darling!
ReplyDeletebeautiful.
ReplyDeletethis post is very wonderful. From, a longish time reader and first time commenter.
ReplyDeleteYou're a beautiful writer and a beautiful woman Nat! The best in the blogosphere.
ReplyDeleteyou are so darling. thanks for the uplift. i want you to know you inspired my post here: http://5for50project.blogspot.com/#!/2012/07/on-being-needed.html.
ReplyDeletei love babies and breakfast at tiffany's and mormons, too. :)
best line ever? "sometimes being the buyer of the cute pants is enough, you know?"
ReplyDeleteso glad you're so happy, 2012 natalie!
Nat-
ReplyDeleteThank you for your today-you reminding today-me to not dread and despair unnecessarily as I am doing right. this. minute.
I just know one day I'll be talking about swim diapers one day...just have to keep today-me in check.
Thanks for the uplift, yo.
yew da bomb. (<-- not cool anymore?)
-ahem-
you're awesome!
I was actually blog stalking you and reading some old post. you had mentioned something about having a baby in nyc but you had moved away at that time....and look. it came true!
ReplyDeleteBrilliant! This goes RIGHT along with things I've been saying/feeling on my blog lately. Mind if I reference your post here?
ReplyDeleteThese have to be some of my favorite posts. There's nothing more beautiful and peaceful and satisfying than noticing and appreciating the beauty and wonder and blessings in our daily lives, the little things that remind us that God is real and that life is beautiful. :)
ReplyDeleteHow to say this without sounding creepy... sometimes I stumble upon blogs that I fall in love with. (I found yours via Syd @ thedaybook) And when I read a few posts, I thought to myself, Oh my goodness I LOVE her!! You are soooo incredibly talented and inspiring. So thank you!! Best wishes to ya. , Meghan
ReplyDeleteLove everything about this post! & Great pants!! :)
ReplyDeletewww.highheelstosneakers.com
When I'm upset or frustrated my Mumsie always says that you don't know what is just around the corner. Frustrating when things are taking what feels like forever and you think "how long until I get to the corner?!" but it always does eventually come
ReplyDeleteWow, your blog was exactly what I needed to hear today. Thanks for the encouragement.
ReplyDeletefabulous post. i think it's awesome that you roll your eyes at yourself and i love that you read your own blog. i don't feel so alone knowing that i read my own blog.
ReplyDeleteI just love you and your blog posts! They always make my days (nights) better!
ReplyDeleteNatalie, you are darling. And inspiring. And just so so funny. Thank you for sharing your 'journal' with us. I am so glad to have found your blog. xo
ReplyDeleteToday me just sobbed while reading this. The comment about inches between our goal really hits home...
ReplyDeleteThank you for being honest about your struggles so those who suffer silently don't feel so alone.
You are really just awesome :)
ReplyDeleteThanks for sharing your stuff, it's cheaper than going to a therapist.
RECORDSCREECHSAYWHAT? <--- absolutely made.my.day. Your good mood has just made my mood great. Thanks.
ReplyDeleteQuestion - where did you get those cute tall shoes?!
ReplyDeletei just recently started following your blog and oh my goodness, it just keeps getting better and better! you are fabulous. keep it up!
ReplyDeleteBravo!
ReplyDeleteOh, wow. I needed that today. Thank you.
ReplyDeleteBTW...and I hope this isn't too weird or anything...but sometimes my sister and I end up shopping at the mall with our criteria for buying a specific item of clothing being whether or not it looks like something Natalie would wear. :)
taking some serious style inspiration from you, lady.
ReplyDeleteI've never commented before, but something about today's post I just love. Love this. Thanks for your public journal!
ReplyDeleteNatalie, I love your blog-it makes me happy. :)
ReplyDelete