ON CAPSULES, UNIFORMS, AND THE 20%

THIS ONE IS A CLUNKER

So, I am the type of girl who likes to think about clothes. I like to notice what others are wearing when I'm out and about, I like to pay attention to what is trendy and what is out. I like to research; I like to compare different items within the same trend bubble and decide which I think is best, like, sneakers--do we prefer Adidas? or Puma? Or mom jeans--American Apparel? 501s? Madewell's Summer Jean? I like to look up prices and compare fabric composition. I probably have four online shopping carts going on at all times and I tinker around with them, taking things out, putting things in, trying things on, sending things back. I love thinking about what our clothing choices say about who we are, I love the personal expression of it all, and I'm fascinated by the anthropological, societal aspect of it. You know, the act of grouping one's self with others via clothing choice. Self-identification. Mostly I just really love thinking way too hard about stuff that isn't all that important. It's fun, what can I say.  

I think I can blame this on my mom--when I was a kid we used to buy two brands of the same thing at once, like, peanut butter: Jiff or Skippy? And then hold very scientific taste tests at the kitchen counter to determine which was best. I don't think I can say this strongly enough: that there is a really good time.

I don't know if this makes me shallow (um, shallow could be my middle name), but if I'm out and about and wearing something that doesn't feel like "me," it somehow manages to distract me all day long. So I've always been really into this idea of identifying who "me" is . . . in clothing form. At first this consisted of finding the things that felt like me, and then buying them. Aaaand then returning them, because something wasn't right. But it hasn't been until recently, when I started to get rid of the things that didn't feel like me, instead, that I really made some progress. Because of course it isn't about imagining what you would wear, if you owned it; it's about identifying what you do wear, and loving it. And then making a concerted effort to have that be IT. 

In my experience, the smaller the closet, the bigger the satisfaction. So that's why I got rid of, like, 80% of my clothing over the last year and a half. It's felt really good.

I've been asked a few times to share my culling process, or some editing tips? Or info on what all I've decided to keep? . . . I think? I'm not actually sure! I only know that any time I mention this on Instagram someone will say, "blog post please!" and then I think, well yeah, that's the kind of post I'd wanna read, too. So here it is! 

I think? 

MY THOUGHTS ON THINGS OF A VARIOUS NATURE RELATED TO CLOTHING, SOMEWHAT

On Capsules vs Uniforms /

Last Autumn I decided to try out the "capsule wardrobe." Trés trendy at the time (and now, too!). I only tend to wear whatever I can see at first glance when I go to get dressed in the morning--an extensive wardrobe tends to be my worst nightmare--so this seemed like a breeze; the perfect non-commital way to test out the minimalist angle and not think too much about my clothes every day. Of course, this involved a lot of thinking really hard about my daily outfits at the outset. :) Soooo . . . It was fun but I didn't feel compelled to do it again. And I think that boils down to this: 

If you're going to ask me, I'd say the difference between a uniform and a capsule has to do with the difference between multiples and uniques. In a capsule, you want as much variety as you can possibly cram into a wardrobe with your small number of allowable pieces, so you tend to aim for the unique multi-taskers. You need a skirt so you have a skirt. You need a sweater in case you need a sweater. You need a dress, should you need a dress. You need a shirt too that will work for all of it, and you need the most versatile pair of jeans you got, maybe two if you nix a sweater. It's a matter of negotiation and compromise, and you run out of room for shoes pretty quickly, which, if you ask me, is a complete and total travesty. Don't limit my shoes! Please! Give me liberty or give me death!

In a uniform, you can have as many white v-neck tee shirts as you could possibly want, you just don't have a ton of other types of tops options to play with. In my uniform, I can have as many shoes as I need. A million shoes! And however many shapes of jeans my heart desires. Because all of these multiple ingredients for me are going to add up to pretty much the same exact outfit, more or less. Like if you had five brands of chocolate chips in your cupboard to choose from and each different brand REALLY made a flavor difference in your cookie. :) A pair of high-waisted light-wash mom jeans plus a striped top feels so incredibly different to me than a skinny jean / striped top combo, even if it's actually . . . not. A black A-line skirt plus gray sweatshirt is really no different from a pair of black high-waisted skinnies plus gray sweatshirt, EXCEPT THAT IT TOTALLY IS. Today I really want to wear my navy Bensimons, tomorrow I will want my tan Bensimons, and the rest of the outfit could be exactly the same but I'll still feel weirdly satisfied by the variety I experience. Your mileage may vary, maybe for you it's A-line skirts or tent dresses or hourglass pencil skirts, but that's the general idea of it. Maybe. I don't really know, but can you believe how long I've gone on talking about this already and the degree of thought to which I've dedicated to it? Pretty amazing I KNOW!

On Defining Your Style/ 

So I wrote a book about this sort of, but probably finding + defining your own personal style is the hardest and most important element to this whole ordeal. Possibly it's something you already know about yourself, what you like and what you don't like, it's just you don't really know you know it. I always advise friends to start with a Pinterest board, pinning like crazy without thinking about it too much, and then going back and analyzing things half to death. 

You guys. I have this theory. I call it "The Pinterest Disconnect." I know, pay attention. So I'm always attracted to all these images of very sparse, plain, androgynous styles on Pinterest; no colors, very chic, all straight lines. BORING. But for a long time when I'd be in stores, I'd go straight for the colors! patterns! fringe! all sorts of things! And then I'd take it home, not want to wear it, or wear it a few times but never feel like myself in it, and then inevitably I'd feel dissatisfied with things, like I needed new clothes, because this obviously wasn't cutting it and I didn't have anything to wear. 

So one day I started to wonder, Why? Why does this happen? Why did I go for one thing in the abstract, but another thing all together in the stores? Why did what I felt looked exactly perfect, like just-what-I-wanted-to-be-wearing, seem like it would be too boring in real life? Like, if it was so basic, if I wasn't trying and if my outfit wasn't creative, or didn't involve intricate pattern mixing and different heel heights or whatever, it wasn't . . . something. I don't know, it was weird. (And dumb.) 

(Come on let's take this as seriously as humanly possible.)  

So I started to experiment with going completely against habit and dressing like my Pinterest pins. And then, what would you know?! It clicked. I felt intensely comfortable. And the more plainly I dressed, the more fun and creative I felt with it. Complete backwards logic, pretty cool.

So that was when my Pinterest Disconnect started to become a Pinterest Yes-Connect! Taduhhhh! 

Things started making sense is what I'm saying here, and when things make sense in your closet, things make sense in your life. I don't know what it is, it's just what I've noticed about things. 

What I gleaned from all this was that I have my own personal set of style rules. I've had them all along! I just didn't know it! Mine go like this:

ONE / 

I can't feel at all fidgety or uncomfortable in it

TWO / 

It has to look like it went on effortlessly (even if it didn't ;)

THREE / 

The colors can't be loud, and must fall within one of the Six Godly Hues: 

Black, White, Brown, Stripes, Denim, Blush

FOUR / 

Nope, can't be girly

FIVE /

Can't be ostentatious, either (no screaming logos)

SIX /

Jumpsuits are A-OK! :)

Generally speaking, I'm succeeding at life over here.

On Culling /

I finally read The Life-Changing Magic of Tidying Up and look you guys, life-changing it was. But don't read it unless you have a hunk of time available right away to dedicate to tossing out crap immediately. Otherwise you'll feel itchy for daaaaays until you can get around to it. 

Culling a wardrobe is probably right up there with popping bubble wrap on the oddly-satisfying scale. It's intimidating, too, and can often provide the opportunity for a surprising amount of self-reflection. Embrace this! Or not. Whatever. In the KonMari method, you are told you will cull until you reach this zen-like state where you no longer want for anything and you treasure every last item in your home and you're, like, awesome. And you thank things after you use them. You don't just get here in one afternoon, though. At least not if you're me. In one form or another I've been culling my home for over a year, and I just now feel close to the end goal. I mean, I AM ALMOST PERFECT, is what I am saying. 

But anyway I think this is the kind of thing you should freely and confidently approach in stages, if you need.

Stage One: You discard and donate the things you have that you know you don't love. This stage is surprisingly the hardest, in my experience. You're timid. You're scared of regretting something. And you waffle. 

Stage Two: Pretty soon after the completion of the first round of culling I realized I wanted to get rid of MORE. So you do. 

Stage Three: This is the refining stage. Just a few things here and there that you realize you didn't really love, it's slowing to a trickle, but there's still a consistent flow of things moving out, and you're probably still super tempted by the distressed shorts, doesn't everybody need a pair of distressed shorts?  

Stage Four: The 20%. I recently read The Joy of Less, and it talks about "The 20%" Most of us use just 20% of our belongings, 80% of the time. Immediately I thought about my gray sweatshirts. I have four--different colors, shapes, you get it--but I have just one that I always get excited over when it comes out of the dryer. I started to think about the rest of the 20% that I wear 80% of the time, and I started to realize that I could very happily go on with my life owning just those pieces, and nothing else. It would be refreshing! The trick to whittling down to this level is in making a tiny pile of your 20%, rather than making a large discard pile out of your 80%. Somehow that slight strategy adjustment makes all the difference.

i'm making amish hats happen. come with me, join the fold. 

On the Trouble with the Twenty Percent /

Well, the trouble with the 20% is that once you realize you love your striped shirt most, you start to realize what's missing about it. You'd love it more if it were nicer, if the fabric were thicker, if the cut were more generous, something like that, and then you begin the search for THEEEEE striped shirt, of all the times, and this can become rather Quixotic rather quickly. 

(St. James Meridien II. In case you're similarly obsessed.) 

So here is my 20%